Basically, we all care about what people think of us in some or the other way. This is the reason why we try to speak English in a better accent (especially those whose mother tongue is not English), we dress so perfectly when socializing, we try to eat what other eat that too with proper etiquettes, moreover, we watch what others watch be it on Netflix, Amazon Prime or any other Hollywood movie.
And if some of us are not doing what others are doing we are forced to hear that if we belong to another planet?
Let's get back to our school days when Justin Beiber and Taylor swift were so new and popular during those days and some of our friends and classmates were used to gossip about them because they had the access to internet and laptops at their home and we were not.
Our friends/classmates used to sing that popular song of Taylor Swift-"You belong with me". But you were clueless, because you were not used to these kinds of songs or because you did not use to have access to the internet, you were from another planet!
All of these reasons caused us peer pressure and now has become a huge part of our life.
To know why we should not care about what others think of us, First, let's discuss why we care about what others think of us.
There are many explanations behind this such as :
- Peer Pressure - Doing what your friends are asking you to do.
- Social Pressure - To meet the standards of social networks.
- Work Pressure - To do work in such a way as to get appreciation from boss and colleagues.
- Relationship Pressure - We want to be the best in front of our partners.
- Other Pressure - To get validation from everyone including strangers.
So instead of wondering what people will think of me? or how would my partner react if I say to him that I want to do a job?
Take a pause, and ask these questions from yourself :
- When was the last time I took my own decision?
- When was the last time I went out freely and limitlessly?
- When did I was just being me and not anybody else?
If you really want to live a life without judgments and seeking validation, here's what you can do :
1. Be Yourself- Live your life the way you want to live. Be your own 100% authentic self and by doing so you will get the right people in your life who will never judge you. By doing so real people will come into your life who will encourage you at every step you will climb. Do not fake your personality just because you want to impress someone. Be the real you and people will love the way you are.
2. Believe In Yourself-
Believe in yourself, your abilities, your skills, your talents, your decision, everything you do for yourself. Have confidence in your strength that no matter what circumstances are there, you will cross them. In your life, you will meet many people who will doubt your capabilities, but you don't have to doubt yourself. You have to fight every odd that come your way and emerge as a winner.
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3. Do What You Like-
Find out what you like and do those things that love to do. For instance; whatever your hobbies are, whatever you genuinely like do that. Don't come under any pressure because people will speak anyway. So why not enjoy your life by doing everything that you like or that you want?
We all know about Steve Jobs, Founder of Apple, he created what he loved to do in his early life, and now he is among the richest men all over the world. Only because he believed in himself and he did what he liked without caring about what others will think of him.
We all know about Steve Jobs, Founder of Apple, he created what he loved to do in his early life, and now he is among the richest men all over the world. Only because he believed in himself and he did what he liked without caring about what others will think of him.
Here is a song to motivate you :
4. Trust Yourself-
Ask a Question to yourself; Do you trust yourself? How many times do you make your own decisions? Probably your answer would be, umm, or you would take a pause for a while. Because we trust others more than we trust yourself. We rely on others to help us when they don't really know us completely. Only we know who we are and what we like the most. The only thing you have to do is trust yourself. If you are doing something you like, you should keep on doing it because you love doing it.
5. Accept Yourself-
Even before others, we are our own worst critic. When we do something wrong, when we mess up things, when we make a mistake, when we embarrass ourselves, we blame ourselves. Every one of us does this. And when we are our worst enemy, people will also say those things. Moreover, we don't care about what we say to ourselves, but we care about what others say to us! Strange, isn't it? It should be the opposite, we should care about what we say to ourselves and not others.
Remember: You are unique and your uniqueness is what makes you different from people. Accept yourself completely because you are your only best friend.
6. You don't have to prove yourself to anyone-
This is your story, your life. Don't get sidetracked of people's opinions. You need to raise your own voice. Your actions should only be based on your dreams and goals. You don't have to let negativity block your way. You have to only prove to yourself, and not others! In fact, you don't have the time to be anyone, but you. So stop trying to prove yourself to others, instead start working hard for your dreams. In the end, this is your life and you have full rights to work on yourself without thinking about others.
CONCLUSION
All of us in an area of our life feel the pressure to perform in such a way so that our friends, colleagues, partners, family appreciate and recognize us. But walking in this path will only give you negativity, constant challenges, and double standard people.
Your strength will take you up to a higher level. So believe in yourself and continue living your life in a way you desire, in a way you want to live. Remember, your scars are what you are.
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