Are you also someone who takes everything on themselves? 

I mean, regardless of what the other person says, do you believe they are doing everything they can to hurt you?

You believe that everything they do or say is done with the intent of making you feel bad about yourself. However, most of the time, these things aren't even about you or caused by you.

So, if you are constantly putting strain on your mind and experiencing feelings of guilt or unease, you must stop.

Because from today onwards you don't need to bother about everything so much.

Here you will get seven easy tips that will allow you to take control over yourself, your emotions, and how you respond to the world while not taking things personally.

But before we proceed further, we need to know why we take everything on ourselves which leads to emotional unrest.

source: pexels

Why do we take things personally?

7 easy ways to stop taking things personally

1.  Don't bother much about people- In the end, It's your life and only you are responsible for it so why give others the remote control? You should only focus on yourself and the people who genuinely care for you. People will come, speak and leave. But you have to live. So live happily.

2.  Take a pause before concluding- When we hear something we didn't expect to hear, we often jump to conclusions, blaming ourselves and others. This is why according to Psychology Today, jumping to conclusions is not only bad for your relationships but also bad for your mental health.

3.  Know that everyone's beliefs are different- If you greet someone and they don't greet you back, what do you do? You may wonder what you did wrong in the past that they did not wish you today! But, before you stress your mind out for the rest of the day over the same incident, remember that everyone is unique. If you greet someone, it means you believe it is polite to do the same, but the other person may not agree or may be upset about something else.

4. Be confident- Confidence is the key to happiness. Improving your self-confidence provides you with a reasonable level of resistance to other people's behaviors and opinions. That self-assurance functions as a barrier, preventing you from reacting negatively to a negative comment about yourself and allowing it to dictate your thinking.

5.  Stay busy- If you are occupied with a lot of stuff you will hardly find time to focus on things that don't matter. This is why it is essential to fill the empty space in your life with your work, hobbies, family, friends, etc so that you will not walk on the line of overthinking. 

6. Stop making assumptions- Another way to stop yourself from getting hurt or take things personally is to stop making assumptions. Misinterpretation or miscommunication can break the relation between two persons. Someone may take something personally because they misunderstood what another person said. In such a case, an unintentional compliment can be misconstrued as a satirical remark.

7.  Know your worth- You don't always need to stay with someone else to be happy. Know that your happiness is an inside job and you are the unique creation of God. Enjoy your own company. Do the things that give you an inner sense of peace or happiness. Focus on improving yourself and don't do anything intentionally to show someone else that you are happy. 

Conclusion

 Whenever someone says about living in the present, we often end up saying- " It's not possible for anyone to just stay in the present and not plan for the future."

Yes, being prepared for the future is beneficial. This is why we put our money into investments and savings. However, getting entirely engrossed in the future is a waste of time.

A few days back, someone asked me about my future plans. And to be honest I had nothing to say. I simply answered them with three words- "To Be Happy!" 

Yes, this little phrase is my future goal and today's motto.

When you are an overthinker, you tend to think a lot about your future and even get dwelled on your past. 

But pause for a second and think if it's worth using your mental energy on things that have already happened or might happen in the future!

Nobody knows if they would wake up the next day and see the bright sun. So why can't we enjoy the current 24 hours that we have?

Let me assure you that I am not pessimistic. I am just making you realize the importance of living in the present moment.

Ask yourself when were you fully aware of the moment? 

Even while you're out with your friends, you're constantly thinking about something, whether it's your parents, your job, your relationship, or something else entirely

At that moment, you are not even exactly listening to what your friends are talking about and, you ask them to repeat what they have just said.

This constant anxiety about the past and future does not allow us to live happily.

Thus, living in the present is the only solution to be happy.

source: Freepik

What is the meaning of living in the present moment?

Conclusion

source:Pexels.com

Whenever we feel any out-of-the-blue happiness or pleasure we feel it is because of the outside circumstances or things happening around us. 

Most of us de-romanticize happiness based on outside factors be it watching a comedy movie, laughing out loud with friends, scoring good grades, etc. 

Although these are just another sort of events happening outside, it's our inner feelings/emotions that make us happy.

But the real part is played by our hormones that are present inside our body. It is the hormones that regulate everything from physical function to emotional well-being. It is because of these hormones that we are able to feel happy/sad. 

Here we will only talk about the four main "happy hormones" that are responsible for our happiness and how we can make the most of them feel happy instantly. 

Types of Happy Hormones

1. Dopamine- Often known as the "neurotransmitter", Dopamine is the most pleasant hormone in our body. It sends signals to the brains which spike our happiness. According to insider.com when you eat something good or hear your favorite song, it is the dopamine that is sending you "feel happy" signals.

2. Seratonin- Seratonin is another form of neurotransmitter after Dopamine as it helps to regulate your mood, appetite, and digestion. It is an important aspect of depression because when a person is depressed he is given medications that increase his Seratonin hormone. Exercising, spending some outdoor time, or getting a good sleep of 7-9 hours increases the Seratonin hormonal level in the body.

5 easy ways to increase happy hormones  and live a happier life

Are you feeling sad for no obvious reason? Well, sometimes it happens with me too. We all go through such moments once in a while.

Sadness over the loss of a loved one, a specific item, or after a breakup is one thing, and being upset for no apparent reason is another.

However, there are times when sadness is persistent and doesn't go away. It can be a flashback of the past trauma, childhood memories, or maybe a symptom of depression.

This is why it is crucial to recognize what is bothering you and treat it immediately so that it does not harm you.

Are you suffering from depression or, is it just your overthinking? Let us find out!

source: pexels.com

Before we move on to find out the difference between sadness and depression. I want to make it clear to you all that I am not a certified psychologist or a mental health counselor. Nor even I have studied psychology. 

This article has been written with the help of all the external resources and my personal findings.

While sadness and depression are two different things. Sadness is just another symptom of depression that can take a toll on our personal lives if not addressed at the right time.

More symptoms of depression along with sadness:

According to verywellmind.com, here are some of the serious symptoms you need to put concern onto;

• anxiety or feeling anxious
• increased irritability
• chest feeling heavy
• guilty of past things
• change in sleep patterns
• insomnia
• lack of energy
• unexplained pain or digestive issues
• lack of concentration or decision making
• not doing things that make you happy

Tips To Take Care Of Your Mental Health When Feeling Sad/Low

Attachment, either physical or emotional, helps to keep us going. Some may confuse it with love, while others are aware of their limits.

So what is this need of becoming detached from others? Why do we frequently hear from others that they require space or that they wish to withdraw from a particular relationship? 

Usually when the attachment is more from one side or when one person is giving more into a relationship they become emotionally dependent on someone. 

Attachment and caring are a part of love. However, when you see yourself willing to do more for others, it means you are dependent on them. This is why many therapists or motivators ask people to withdraw themselves from others so they do not get hurt.

Here we will learn why, when & how to detach from someone.

Detaching or detachment does not mean you should isolate yourself so that nobody can hurt you. It means to focus on yourself and your needs so that you do not worry about someone else's behavior.

It is the ability to emotionally disconnect from another person. Also, it suggests that you are willing to cut all links from another person emotionally and physically. Although physical space or separation can help us set boundaries and center ourselves, this is not what detaching entails.

Why do you need to detach now?

Detachment is a state of mind that, if cultivated, may be extremely beneficial in one's life. It's fine to form attachments with others, whether they're close friends or family members, but if they're causing you to lose your mind, you should cut ties with them right there.

Let's take an example- Sia has four friends. They all hang out with each other almost every weekend. Sia is happy with them because she gets positive vibes whenever she meets them. However, two of Sia's friends meet alone and do not inform her. They've started hiding things from her now. But Sia is so emotionally attached to them that she can't sleep at night, wondering why her friends are behaving this way.

In this case, Sia is suffering a lot emotionally because she has vested her feelings in them.

Yes, I know you would say that it's okay for Sia to feel this way. Many of us would get hurt knowing that our friends are hiding something from us.

But this is what attachment does to us. It sucks out our happiness and brings us to the point where we have to ask others to give us attention and love.

Why? 

Why do I have to ask others to involve me in their conversations? 

That is why DETACHMENT matters! When you mentally set your boundaries, you are aware that everyone has their own set of behaviors and will do what they believe is right. You will not be bothered.

When should you detach from someone?

You may be wondering the right time to detach from others. Detachment is nothing but putting all focus on ourselves rather than others. It simply means to let go of what other people do or think, no matter how close you are.  

So if you want to know when is the right time to step back from someone emotionally, ask yourself these questions:

• Does your happiness rely on others?

• Are you available for someone every time they ask you?

• Do you spend time worrying about other people's problems?

• Do you have strong emotional reactions to other people's ideas, thoughts, feelings, and judgments?

• Do you put your career, hobbies, activities, or friends on hold because of a relationship?

• Do you wonder what others are doing and thinking?

Conclusion

Have you ever been in a position when you know the other person does not want to talk with you but you still want to?

They're implying that they don't want to be with you by their acts and behaviors, but you're not ready to accept this!

You want them to call you or text you. And when they do not call or respond to your texts, you check them on all the other social media platforms.

Seeing them online on Facebook or Whatsapp makes your heartache Isn't it?

Trust me I know how it feels to feel abandoned, and shattered. It looks like we are the most unworthy human on this planet. We beat ourselves up. We feel guilt and shame and curse our destiny.

source: pixabay

It is the most pathetic thing that we all humans do (except those who love themselves).

Yes, someone who is incubated with self-love will never beg anyone to be in their lives. They won't run or chase someone because they are happy loving themselves. They are full of love and, they give love to everyone around them without expecting others to return them the same. 

Thats' what we all should do! 

We can't change anyone else, but we can change ourselves.

I know you might think that- "It's easy to say so, but hard to give up on someone whom you love so much!"

But my dear, let me tell you- "Someone who is intended to be with you or belongs in your life will always be there. You'll never have to question your place in their lives!"

Do this instead of chasing someone

Conclusion

When you already have what you need, you won't expect others to give it to you. For example, suppose you have a cup of ice cream and the other person does as well. If you get an ice cream craving now, you'll eat it right off your plate. Even if the other person does not provide, you will not be disappointed because you already have all you require.

The same is the case with love. If you love yourself and speak respectfully to yourself, it doesn't matter whether or not the other person talks politely to you. This is how our life works. 

Offer yourself what you want others to give you first, whether it's an emotional or mental need.

Ever find yourself hopeless thinking about your future? 

On the one hand, there are your ambitions, passions, and objectives whereas, on the other hand, there is your current reality, which is where you are right now.

You want to get to the other side, but something is preventing you from doing so. Isn't that so?

Trust me. Every successful person you know has been there.

But the only thing that pushed them forward is that they didn't let their current reality take control over their minds.

There can be many things that are not letting you reach your desired destination. You may not even be aware of them. However, if you figure out what that one item (or a collection of things) is, you can move on to living the life of your dreams.

Here are some beneficial tips that you must follow in order to get back on track and life the life of your dreams:

• Accept your reality- The first thing you have to do is accept where you are. Admit that you are not where you want to be. Jot it down and, your brain will automatically start working out to find solutions. There is no need to compare yourself to others and feel sad. Thus, accepting your current situation will let you move to the next step swiftly.

• Stop feeling guilty- It's okay if you have not reached your final destination. You don't have to beat yourself up or feel guilty about it. What matters the most is you have become responsible and are willing to change your reality. This itself is a big thing for you. So don't pressurize yourself and start working on your future goals.

• Set small goals- Most people make the mistake of setting bigger goals and hustle towards achieving them. For example, some people may set a goal to lose 10 kg in a month or to earn $1000 in a month, which is a big challenge. When they don't achieve their objectives, they either give up or start berating themselves. Instead, start creating smaller goals for yourself that you can actually attain.

• Change your environment- Often you don't realize that environment plays a big role in your success. The daily habits that you do, the people you meet, the information you consume have a lot of impact on your brain. As a result, if you want to achieve your goals and become a better person, you must modify your environment.

• Regain confidence-  Self-confidence is the root of a happy life. If you have confidence and belief that you can do anything, nobody can stop you! It's more than just getting out of bed and going to work; it's about showing up with a plan for the day. Once you have done all the above steps, it is time to kick off and start working towards improving your life. Whether it is related to fitness, money, relationship or, business, remember you have the power to achieve anything.

Bottom Line

Are you also someone who takes everything on themselves? 

I mean, regardless of what the other person says, do you believe they are doing everything they can to hurt you?

You believe that everything they do or say is done with the intent of making you feel bad about yourself. However, most of the time, these things aren't even about you or caused by you.

So, if you are constantly putting strain on your mind and experiencing feelings of guilt or unease, you must stop.

Because from today onwards you don't need to bother about everything so much.

Here you will get seven easy tips that will allow you to take control over yourself, your emotions, and how you respond to the world while not taking things personally.

But before we proceed further, we need to know why we take everything on ourselves which leads to emotional unrest.

source: pexels

Why do we take things personally?

7 easy ways to stop taking things personally

1.  Don't bother much about people- In the end, It's your life and only you are responsible for it so why give others the remote control? You should only focus on yourself and the people who genuinely care for you. People will come, speak and leave. But you have to live. So live happily.

2.  Take a pause before concluding- When we hear something we didn't expect to hear, we often jump to conclusions, blaming ourselves and others. This is why according to Psychology Today, jumping to conclusions is not only bad for your relationships but also bad for your mental health.

3.  Know that everyone's beliefs are different- If you greet someone and they don't greet you back, what do you do? You may wonder what you did wrong in the past that they did not wish you today! But, before you stress your mind out for the rest of the day over the same incident, remember that everyone is unique. If you greet someone, it means you believe it is polite to do the same, but the other person may not agree or may be upset about something else.

4. Be confident- Confidence is the key to happiness. Improving your self-confidence provides you with a reasonable level of resistance to other people's behaviors and opinions. That self-assurance functions as a barrier, preventing you from reacting negatively to a negative comment about yourself and allowing it to dictate your thinking.

5.  Stay busy- If you are occupied with a lot of stuff you will hardly find time to focus on things that don't matter. This is why it is essential to fill the empty space in your life with your work, hobbies, family, friends, etc so that you will not walk on the line of overthinking. 

6. Stop making assumptions- Another way to stop yourself from getting hurt or take things personally is to stop making assumptions. Misinterpretation or miscommunication can break the relation between two persons. Someone may take something personally because they misunderstood what another person said. In such a case, an unintentional compliment can be misconstrued as a satirical remark.

7.  Know your worth- You don't always need to stay with someone else to be happy. Know that your happiness is an inside job and you are the unique creation of God. Enjoy your own company. Do the things that give you an inner sense of peace or happiness. Focus on improving yourself and don't do anything intentionally to show someone else that you are happy. 

Conclusion

 Whenever someone says about living in the present, we often end up saying- " It's not possible for anyone to just stay in the present and not plan for the future."

Yes, being prepared for the future is beneficial. This is why we put our money into investments and savings. However, getting entirely engrossed in the future is a waste of time.

A few days back, someone asked me about my future plans. And to be honest I had nothing to say. I simply answered them with three words- "To Be Happy!" 

Yes, this little phrase is my future goal and today's motto.

When you are an overthinker, you tend to think a lot about your future and even get dwelled on your past. 

But pause for a second and think if it's worth using your mental energy on things that have already happened or might happen in the future!

Nobody knows if they would wake up the next day and see the bright sun. So why can't we enjoy the current 24 hours that we have?

Let me assure you that I am not pessimistic. I am just making you realize the importance of living in the present moment.

Ask yourself when were you fully aware of the moment? 

Even while you're out with your friends, you're constantly thinking about something, whether it's your parents, your job, your relationship, or something else entirely

At that moment, you are not even exactly listening to what your friends are talking about and, you ask them to repeat what they have just said.

This constant anxiety about the past and future does not allow us to live happily.

Thus, living in the present is the only solution to be happy.

source: Freepik

What is the meaning of living in the present moment?

Conclusion

source:Pexels.com

Whenever we feel any out-of-the-blue happiness or pleasure we feel it is because of the outside circumstances or things happening around us. 

Most of us de-romanticize happiness based on outside factors be it watching a comedy movie, laughing out loud with friends, scoring good grades, etc. 

Although these are just another sort of events happening outside, it's our inner feelings/emotions that make us happy.

But the real part is played by our hormones that are present inside our body. It is the hormones that regulate everything from physical function to emotional well-being. It is because of these hormones that we are able to feel happy/sad. 

Here we will only talk about the four main "happy hormones" that are responsible for our happiness and how we can make the most of them feel happy instantly. 

Types of Happy Hormones

1. Dopamine- Often known as the "neurotransmitter", Dopamine is the most pleasant hormone in our body. It sends signals to the brains which spike our happiness. According to insider.com when you eat something good or hear your favorite song, it is the dopamine that is sending you "feel happy" signals.

2. Seratonin- Seratonin is another form of neurotransmitter after Dopamine as it helps to regulate your mood, appetite, and digestion. It is an important aspect of depression because when a person is depressed he is given medications that increase his Seratonin hormone. Exercising, spending some outdoor time, or getting a good sleep of 7-9 hours increases the Seratonin hormonal level in the body.

5 easy ways to increase happy hormones  and live a happier life

Are you feeling sad for no obvious reason? Well, sometimes it happens with me too. We all go through such moments once in a while.

Sadness over the loss of a loved one, a specific item, or after a breakup is one thing, and being upset for no apparent reason is another.

However, there are times when sadness is persistent and doesn't go away. It can be a flashback of the past trauma, childhood memories, or maybe a symptom of depression.

This is why it is crucial to recognize what is bothering you and treat it immediately so that it does not harm you.

Are you suffering from depression or, is it just your overthinking? Let us find out!

source: pexels.com

Before we move on to find out the difference between sadness and depression. I want to make it clear to you all that I am not a certified psychologist or a mental health counselor. Nor even I have studied psychology. 

This article has been written with the help of all the external resources and my personal findings.

While sadness and depression are two different things. Sadness is just another symptom of depression that can take a toll on our personal lives if not addressed at the right time.

More symptoms of depression along with sadness:

According to verywellmind.com, here are some of the serious symptoms you need to put concern onto;

• anxiety or feeling anxious
• increased irritability
• chest feeling heavy
• guilty of past things
• change in sleep patterns
• insomnia
• lack of energy
• unexplained pain or digestive issues
• lack of concentration or decision making
• not doing things that make you happy

Tips To Take Care Of Your Mental Health When Feeling Sad/Low

Attachment, either physical or emotional, helps to keep us going. Some may confuse it with love, while others are aware of their limits.

So what is this need of becoming detached from others? Why do we frequently hear from others that they require space or that they wish to withdraw from a particular relationship? 

Usually when the attachment is more from one side or when one person is giving more into a relationship they become emotionally dependent on someone. 

Attachment and caring are a part of love. However, when you see yourself willing to do more for others, it means you are dependent on them. This is why many therapists or motivators ask people to withdraw themselves from others so they do not get hurt.

Here we will learn why, when & how to detach from someone.

Detaching or detachment does not mean you should isolate yourself so that nobody can hurt you. It means to focus on yourself and your needs so that you do not worry about someone else's behavior.

It is the ability to emotionally disconnect from another person. Also, it suggests that you are willing to cut all links from another person emotionally and physically. Although physical space or separation can help us set boundaries and center ourselves, this is not what detaching entails.

Why do you need to detach now?

Detachment is a state of mind that, if cultivated, may be extremely beneficial in one's life. It's fine to form attachments with others, whether they're close friends or family members, but if they're causing you to lose your mind, you should cut ties with them right there.

Let's take an example- Sia has four friends. They all hang out with each other almost every weekend. Sia is happy with them because she gets positive vibes whenever she meets them. However, two of Sia's friends meet alone and do not inform her. They've started hiding things from her now. But Sia is so emotionally attached to them that she can't sleep at night, wondering why her friends are behaving this way.

In this case, Sia is suffering a lot emotionally because she has vested her feelings in them.

Yes, I know you would say that it's okay for Sia to feel this way. Many of us would get hurt knowing that our friends are hiding something from us.

But this is what attachment does to us. It sucks out our happiness and brings us to the point where we have to ask others to give us attention and love.

Why? 

Why do I have to ask others to involve me in their conversations? 

That is why DETACHMENT matters! When you mentally set your boundaries, you are aware that everyone has their own set of behaviors and will do what they believe is right. You will not be bothered.

When should you detach from someone?

You may be wondering the right time to detach from others. Detachment is nothing but putting all focus on ourselves rather than others. It simply means to let go of what other people do or think, no matter how close you are.  

So if you want to know when is the right time to step back from someone emotionally, ask yourself these questions:

• Does your happiness rely on others?

• Are you available for someone every time they ask you?

• Do you spend time worrying about other people's problems?

• Do you have strong emotional reactions to other people's ideas, thoughts, feelings, and judgments?

• Do you put your career, hobbies, activities, or friends on hold because of a relationship?

• Do you wonder what others are doing and thinking?

Conclusion

Have you ever been in a position when you know the other person does not want to talk with you but you still want to?

They're implying that they don't want to be with you by their acts and behaviors, but you're not ready to accept this!

You want them to call you or text you. And when they do not call or respond to your texts, you check them on all the other social media platforms.

Seeing them online on Facebook or Whatsapp makes your heartache Isn't it?

Trust me I know how it feels to feel abandoned, and shattered. It looks like we are the most unworthy human on this planet. We beat ourselves up. We feel guilt and shame and curse our destiny.

source: pixabay

It is the most pathetic thing that we all humans do (except those who love themselves).

Yes, someone who is incubated with self-love will never beg anyone to be in their lives. They won't run or chase someone because they are happy loving themselves. They are full of love and, they give love to everyone around them without expecting others to return them the same. 

Thats' what we all should do! 

We can't change anyone else, but we can change ourselves.

I know you might think that- "It's easy to say so, but hard to give up on someone whom you love so much!"

But my dear, let me tell you- "Someone who is intended to be with you or belongs in your life will always be there. You'll never have to question your place in their lives!"

Do this instead of chasing someone

Conclusion

When you already have what you need, you won't expect others to give it to you. For example, suppose you have a cup of ice cream and the other person does as well. If you get an ice cream craving now, you'll eat it right off your plate. Even if the other person does not provide, you will not be disappointed because you already have all you require.

The same is the case with love. If you love yourself and speak respectfully to yourself, it doesn't matter whether or not the other person talks politely to you. This is how our life works. 

Offer yourself what you want others to give you first, whether it's an emotional or mental need.

Ever find yourself hopeless thinking about your future? 

On the one hand, there are your ambitions, passions, and objectives whereas, on the other hand, there is your current reality, which is where you are right now.

You want to get to the other side, but something is preventing you from doing so. Isn't that so?

Trust me. Every successful person you know has been there.

But the only thing that pushed them forward is that they didn't let their current reality take control over their minds.

There can be many things that are not letting you reach your desired destination. You may not even be aware of them. However, if you figure out what that one item (or a collection of things) is, you can move on to living the life of your dreams.

Here are some beneficial tips that you must follow in order to get back on track and life the life of your dreams:

• Accept your reality- The first thing you have to do is accept where you are. Admit that you are not where you want to be. Jot it down and, your brain will automatically start working out to find solutions. There is no need to compare yourself to others and feel sad. Thus, accepting your current situation will let you move to the next step swiftly.

• Stop feeling guilty- It's okay if you have not reached your final destination. You don't have to beat yourself up or feel guilty about it. What matters the most is you have become responsible and are willing to change your reality. This itself is a big thing for you. So don't pressurize yourself and start working on your future goals.

• Set small goals- Most people make the mistake of setting bigger goals and hustle towards achieving them. For example, some people may set a goal to lose 10 kg in a month or to earn $1000 in a month, which is a big challenge. When they don't achieve their objectives, they either give up or start berating themselves. Instead, start creating smaller goals for yourself that you can actually attain.

• Change your environment- Often you don't realize that environment plays a big role in your success. The daily habits that you do, the people you meet, the information you consume have a lot of impact on your brain. As a result, if you want to achieve your goals and become a better person, you must modify your environment.

• Regain confidence-  Self-confidence is the root of a happy life. If you have confidence and belief that you can do anything, nobody can stop you! It's more than just getting out of bed and going to work; it's about showing up with a plan for the day. Once you have done all the above steps, it is time to kick off and start working towards improving your life. Whether it is related to fitness, money, relationship or, business, remember you have the power to achieve anything.

Bottom Line

Are you also someone who takes everything on themselves? 

I mean, regardless of what the other person says, do you believe they are doing everything they can to hurt you?

You believe that everything they do or say is done with the intent of making you feel bad about yourself. However, most of the time, these things aren't even about you or caused by you.

So, if you are constantly putting strain on your mind and experiencing feelings of guilt or unease, you must stop.

Because from today onwards you don't need to bother about everything so much.

Here you will get seven easy tips that will allow you to take control over yourself, your emotions, and how you respond to the world while not taking things personally.

But before we proceed further, we need to know why we take everything on ourselves which leads to emotional unrest.

source: pexels

Why do we take things personally?

7 easy ways to stop taking things personally

1.  Don't bother much about people- In the end, It's your life and only you are responsible for it so why give others the remote control? You should only focus on yourself and the people who genuinely care for you. People will come, speak and leave. But you have to live. So live happily.

2.  Take a pause before concluding- When we hear something we didn't expect to hear, we often jump to conclusions, blaming ourselves and others. This is why according to Psychology Today, jumping to conclusions is not only bad for your relationships but also bad for your mental health.

3.  Know that everyone's beliefs are different- If you greet someone and they don't greet you back, what do you do? You may wonder what you did wrong in the past that they did not wish you today! But, before you stress your mind out for the rest of the day over the same incident, remember that everyone is unique. If you greet someone, it means you believe it is polite to do the same, but the other person may not agree or may be upset about something else.

4. Be confident- Confidence is the key to happiness. Improving your self-confidence provides you with a reasonable level of resistance to other people's behaviors and opinions. That self-assurance functions as a barrier, preventing you from reacting negatively to a negative comment about yourself and allowing it to dictate your thinking.

5.  Stay busy- If you are occupied with a lot of stuff you will hardly find time to focus on things that don't matter. This is why it is essential to fill the empty space in your life with your work, hobbies, family, friends, etc so that you will not walk on the line of overthinking. 

6. Stop making assumptions- Another way to stop yourself from getting hurt or take things personally is to stop making assumptions. Misinterpretation or miscommunication can break the relation between two persons. Someone may take something personally because they misunderstood what another person said. In such a case, an unintentional compliment can be misconstrued as a satirical remark.

7.  Know your worth- You don't always need to stay with someone else to be happy. Know that your happiness is an inside job and you are the unique creation of God. Enjoy your own company. Do the things that give you an inner sense of peace or happiness. Focus on improving yourself and don't do anything intentionally to show someone else that you are happy. 

Conclusion

 Whenever someone says about living in the present, we often end up saying- " It's not possible for anyone to just stay in the present and not plan for the future."

Yes, being prepared for the future is beneficial. This is why we put our money into investments and savings. However, getting entirely engrossed in the future is a waste of time.

A few days back, someone asked me about my future plans. And to be honest I had nothing to say. I simply answered them with three words- "To Be Happy!" 

Yes, this little phrase is my future goal and today's motto.

When you are an overthinker, you tend to think a lot about your future and even get dwelled on your past. 

But pause for a second and think if it's worth using your mental energy on things that have already happened or might happen in the future!

Nobody knows if they would wake up the next day and see the bright sun. So why can't we enjoy the current 24 hours that we have?

Let me assure you that I am not pessimistic. I am just making you realize the importance of living in the present moment.

Ask yourself when were you fully aware of the moment? 

Even while you're out with your friends, you're constantly thinking about something, whether it's your parents, your job, your relationship, or something else entirely

At that moment, you are not even exactly listening to what your friends are talking about and, you ask them to repeat what they have just said.

This constant anxiety about the past and future does not allow us to live happily.

Thus, living in the present is the only solution to be happy.

source: Freepik

What is the meaning of living in the present moment?

Conclusion

source:Pexels.com

Whenever we feel any out-of-the-blue happiness or pleasure we feel it is because of the outside circumstances or things happening around us. 

Most of us de-romanticize happiness based on outside factors be it watching a comedy movie, laughing out loud with friends, scoring good grades, etc. 

Although these are just another sort of events happening outside, it's our inner feelings/emotions that make us happy.

But the real part is played by our hormones that are present inside our body. It is the hormones that regulate everything from physical function to emotional well-being. It is because of these hormones that we are able to feel happy/sad. 

Here we will only talk about the four main "happy hormones" that are responsible for our happiness and how we can make the most of them feel happy instantly. 

Types of Happy Hormones

1. Dopamine- Often known as the "neurotransmitter", Dopamine is the most pleasant hormone in our body. It sends signals to the brains which spike our happiness. According to insider.com when you eat something good or hear your favorite song, it is the dopamine that is sending you "feel happy" signals.

2. Seratonin- Seratonin is another form of neurotransmitter after Dopamine as it helps to regulate your mood, appetite, and digestion. It is an important aspect of depression because when a person is depressed he is given medications that increase his Seratonin hormone. Exercising, spending some outdoor time, or getting a good sleep of 7-9 hours increases the Seratonin hormonal level in the body.

5 easy ways to increase happy hormones  and live a happier life

Are you feeling sad for no obvious reason? Well, sometimes it happens with me too. We all go through such moments once in a while.

Sadness over the loss of a loved one, a specific item, or after a breakup is one thing, and being upset for no apparent reason is another.

However, there are times when sadness is persistent and doesn't go away. It can be a flashback of the past trauma, childhood memories, or maybe a symptom of depression.

This is why it is crucial to recognize what is bothering you and treat it immediately so that it does not harm you.

Are you suffering from depression or, is it just your overthinking? Let us find out!

source: pexels.com

Before we move on to find out the difference between sadness and depression. I want to make it clear to you all that I am not a certified psychologist or a mental health counselor. Nor even I have studied psychology. 

This article has been written with the help of all the external resources and my personal findings.

While sadness and depression are two different things. Sadness is just another symptom of depression that can take a toll on our personal lives if not addressed at the right time.

More symptoms of depression along with sadness:

According to verywellmind.com, here are some of the serious symptoms you need to put concern onto;

• anxiety or feeling anxious
• increased irritability
• chest feeling heavy
• guilty of past things
• change in sleep patterns
• insomnia
• lack of energy
• unexplained pain or digestive issues
• lack of concentration or decision making
• not doing things that make you happy

Tips To Take Care Of Your Mental Health When Feeling Sad/Low

Attachment, either physical or emotional, helps to keep us going. Some may confuse it with love, while others are aware of their limits.

So what is this need of becoming detached from others? Why do we frequently hear from others that they require space or that they wish to withdraw from a particular relationship? 

Usually when the attachment is more from one side or when one person is giving more into a relationship they become emotionally dependent on someone. 

Attachment and caring are a part of love. However, when you see yourself willing to do more for others, it means you are dependent on them. This is why many therapists or motivators ask people to withdraw themselves from others so they do not get hurt.

Here we will learn why, when & how to detach from someone.

Detaching or detachment does not mean you should isolate yourself so that nobody can hurt you. It means to focus on yourself and your needs so that you do not worry about someone else's behavior.

It is the ability to emotionally disconnect from another person. Also, it suggests that you are willing to cut all links from another person emotionally and physically. Although physical space or separation can help us set boundaries and center ourselves, this is not what detaching entails.

Why do you need to detach now?

Detachment is a state of mind that, if cultivated, may be extremely beneficial in one's life. It's fine to form attachments with others, whether they're close friends or family members, but if they're causing you to lose your mind, you should cut ties with them right there.

Let's take an example- Sia has four friends. They all hang out with each other almost every weekend. Sia is happy with them because she gets positive vibes whenever she meets them. However, two of Sia's friends meet alone and do not inform her. They've started hiding things from her now. But Sia is so emotionally attached to them that she can't sleep at night, wondering why her friends are behaving this way.

In this case, Sia is suffering a lot emotionally because she has vested her feelings in them.

Yes, I know you would say that it's okay for Sia to feel this way. Many of us would get hurt knowing that our friends are hiding something from us.

But this is what attachment does to us. It sucks out our happiness and brings us to the point where we have to ask others to give us attention and love.

Why? 

Why do I have to ask others to involve me in their conversations? 

That is why DETACHMENT matters! When you mentally set your boundaries, you are aware that everyone has their own set of behaviors and will do what they believe is right. You will not be bothered.

When should you detach from someone?

You may be wondering the right time to detach from others. Detachment is nothing but putting all focus on ourselves rather than others. It simply means to let go of what other people do or think, no matter how close you are.  

So if you want to know when is the right time to step back from someone emotionally, ask yourself these questions:

• Does your happiness rely on others?

• Are you available for someone every time they ask you?

• Do you spend time worrying about other people's problems?

• Do you have strong emotional reactions to other people's ideas, thoughts, feelings, and judgments?

• Do you put your career, hobbies, activities, or friends on hold because of a relationship?

• Do you wonder what others are doing and thinking?

Conclusion

Have you ever been in a position when you know the other person does not want to talk with you but you still want to?

They're implying that they don't want to be with you by their acts and behaviors, but you're not ready to accept this!

You want them to call you or text you. And when they do not call or respond to your texts, you check them on all the other social media platforms.

Seeing them online on Facebook or Whatsapp makes your heartache Isn't it?

Trust me I know how it feels to feel abandoned, and shattered. It looks like we are the most unworthy human on this planet. We beat ourselves up. We feel guilt and shame and curse our destiny.

source: pixabay

It is the most pathetic thing that we all humans do (except those who love themselves).

Yes, someone who is incubated with self-love will never beg anyone to be in their lives. They won't run or chase someone because they are happy loving themselves. They are full of love and, they give love to everyone around them without expecting others to return them the same. 

Thats' what we all should do! 

We can't change anyone else, but we can change ourselves.

I know you might think that- "It's easy to say so, but hard to give up on someone whom you love so much!"

But my dear, let me tell you- "Someone who is intended to be with you or belongs in your life will always be there. You'll never have to question your place in their lives!"

Do this instead of chasing someone

Conclusion

When you already have what you need, you won't expect others to give it to you. For example, suppose you have a cup of ice cream and the other person does as well. If you get an ice cream craving now, you'll eat it right off your plate. Even if the other person does not provide, you will not be disappointed because you already have all you require.

The same is the case with love. If you love yourself and speak respectfully to yourself, it doesn't matter whether or not the other person talks politely to you. This is how our life works. 

Offer yourself what you want others to give you first, whether it's an emotional or mental need.

Ever find yourself hopeless thinking about your future? 

On the one hand, there are your ambitions, passions, and objectives whereas, on the other hand, there is your current reality, which is where you are right now.

You want to get to the other side, but something is preventing you from doing so. Isn't that so?

Trust me. Every successful person you know has been there.

But the only thing that pushed them forward is that they didn't let their current reality take control over their minds.

There can be many things that are not letting you reach your desired destination. You may not even be aware of them. However, if you figure out what that one item (or a collection of things) is, you can move on to living the life of your dreams.

Here are some beneficial tips that you must follow in order to get back on track and life the life of your dreams:

• Accept your reality- The first thing you have to do is accept where you are. Admit that you are not where you want to be. Jot it down and, your brain will automatically start working out to find solutions. There is no need to compare yourself to others and feel sad. Thus, accepting your current situation will let you move to the next step swiftly.

• Stop feeling guilty- It's okay if you have not reached your final destination. You don't have to beat yourself up or feel guilty about it. What matters the most is you have become responsible and are willing to change your reality. This itself is a big thing for you. So don't pressurize yourself and start working on your future goals.

• Set small goals- Most people make the mistake of setting bigger goals and hustle towards achieving them. For example, some people may set a goal to lose 10 kg in a month or to earn $1000 in a month, which is a big challenge. When they don't achieve their objectives, they either give up or start berating themselves. Instead, start creating smaller goals for yourself that you can actually attain.

• Change your environment- Often you don't realize that environment plays a big role in your success. The daily habits that you do, the people you meet, the information you consume have a lot of impact on your brain. As a result, if you want to achieve your goals and become a better person, you must modify your environment.

• Regain confidence-  Self-confidence is the root of a happy life. If you have confidence and belief that you can do anything, nobody can stop you! It's more than just getting out of bed and going to work; it's about showing up with a plan for the day. Once you have done all the above steps, it is time to kick off and start working towards improving your life. Whether it is related to fitness, money, relationship or, business, remember you have the power to achieve anything.

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